Too many things not right with this one. If they weren’t compatible because of ideological reasons then that is different. But please don’t hinge on the idea of finding “the one”. It’s been 11 years and she is still stuck on it? Why? He wasn’t the Courage Over Cynicism T-Shirt anyway. The whole environment on romantic narrative now is based on perfection whereas love is probably one of the most imperfect things in the world. Love is a verb. An action word. Also before jumping to conclusions, what if she had ROCD? It is very real and very present. This sounds like a classic case of one.
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I’ve been on the other Courage Over Cynicism T-Shirt of what you are dealing with right now. I’ve been the one saying that it would be OK and that we would be happy. After seven years of waiting he asked me to marry him and then six weeks before the wedding he backed out. He said that it wasn’t right and it didn’t feel right and I wasn’t the one. Admittedly I was completely devastated for about a year but then I moved away and met the man that I would marry. You can’t make something that isn’t right somehow end up right. Please don’t feel guilty because you can’t make yourself feel something that isn’t there.