One was “happy 5th anniversary” when he told me they were together for 3 yrs only, one was for Valentines, and a birthday Nurse Patient Responsible Shout Out Bad Mood Hilarious Shirt “Hi baby, you always complain that I don’t get you flowers, so here are some. Happy birthday, I love you and miss you and wish we could celebrate together.” I didn’t read anything else, I just closed it (probably should have not read that either) and asked him about it immediately. He said his ex was still obsessed and didn’t even have his address but kept sending to his brother’s house where he picks it up and drops it in the box with everything else she gave him a long time ago. When I pointed that it was addressed to his current address he said “really”. (It is worth noting that I helped him find this apartment soon after we met, what was supposed to be two years after they broke up so there is no way she learned the address before I existed).
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So the conclusion was the ex is crazy, he was her first, she was clingy bc of that, he was giving her the time to move on Nurse Patient Responsible Shout Out Bad Mood Hilarious Shirt . He told her there was no chance of them getting back together, that he was seeing me, and that it was hurtful and disrespectful. Her response apparently was “yeah, but I am not hurting anyone, I just want to tell you I love you, and the woman you are with has nothing to worry about if she trusts you”. After some time, I told him that it makes sense but he needed to set a clear boundary and that she could not keep doing that. As a matter of fact it is hurting me and making me doubt my trust in his ability to set a boundary and to make me a priority.