Wall of text ahead so please bear with me. I have a history of depression and anxiety since 13 Vintage MBNA shirt 90s MBNA Nascar shirt now (I cannot even remember what my life was like before these illnesses came along). I sought treatment actively when I was 20 and have been on antidepressants and in therapy ever since. Most days of the year I am OKAY, but some phases are unmanageable. There is always one thing that triggers debilitating anxiety attacks for me: men.
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I had a terrifying relationship from 22-25 which has left me with major trust and abandonment issues on top of all my other Vintage MBNA shirt 90s MBNA Nascar shirt . He was cheating on me throughout the 3 years and I had no idea and I found out one day before they were getting engaged that another girl existed and he was playing me all along. He said I could never be wanted by any man and that the other girl was the love of his life all along he just didnt know how to get rid of me. This cemented my low self-esteem further. Up until I was 25 I had never held a job for a period longer than 6 months. Whenever I would fight wiht my X i would start getting anxiety – physical anxiety – heart racing, stomach hurting and nausea to the point where 9/10 times I would throw up. This obviously scared him even more and I guess it would scare anyone who does not understand how anxiety can manifest physically.